Welcome to the neighborhood

So I'm pulling into my driveway after a very busy afternoon of reading the paper over an asiago bagel at Einsteins when I see three teenagers standing under the parking cover in the back of my building. I'm a little taken back as to why there are kids hanging around the back of my house, seeing as there are only two apartments in the building and mine is the only one occupied. I park the car as one of these kids comes over to me and asks to roll the window down. He looks terrified, as do the other two, and asks me if I can give them a ride to their high school, which is about 2 blocks away.

Me: "Uh, why?"

Teenager: "We just got chased down by some homies with guns driving a white Expedition."

Now, I'm all for helping someone out in a time of crisis, but I was still trying to process the connotation of "homies" and "guns" before I was committed to a rescue. However, these kids were seriously freaked out so of course I told them to get in. And get down.

As I drove towards their school, one of them was on the phone with the police, who instructed him to go back to where they were and an officer would be on the way. So we made a loop, nervously looking out for a gang-banging white Expedition. Fortunately for them, and me, we made it back to my apartment safely. I had them come in, where, even in the midst of a potential drive-by shooting, I apologized for the lack of furniture. It's coming, I explained. They thanked me and told me that they had walked down to a nearby convenience store to grab some lunch during their break and were harassed by the guys in the Expedition. Being the smart, logical teenagers that they are, they began yelling all sorts of choice words and phrases at their harassers, until one of the "homies" pulled out a gun. That's when they ran away, Expedition following them, eventually ending up in my driveway to hide.

The police eventually showed up, took down their stories ("Yo, it was heated, yo. I said, fool let's go , and that's when he pulled the strap," uh...ok) and mine ("Yeah, um, I just moved here") and then gave them a ride back to school, where I'm sure they recreated the story to an enthusiastic 5th period. Suffice it to say, it was a bit of an exciting afternoon.

But jeez. Kids these days, right?