It's All Relative

Top Ten Answers to the Question, "How Hot Is It?"

...as reported by the Late Show with Dave Letterman

July 17, 2006

10. "It's so hot, Kim Jong Il has been stockpiling Italian ices"

9. "It's so hot, Star Jones has enjoyed getting the cold shoulder from Barbara Walters"

8. "It's so hot, Kobe Bryant is only nailing girls who work at Dairy Queen"

7. "It's so hot, Regis is hosting a new show called 'America's Got Heat Stroke'"

6. "It's so hot, President Bush told the sun to 'Stop doing this sh**'"

5. "It's so hot, the terror alert level was raised to 'sweaty'"

4. "It's so hot, the writer passed out before he could finish this joke"

3. "It's so hot, Osama Bin Laden was spotted in front of the air conditioners at P.C. Richard"

2. "It's so hot, a disoriented Bill Clinton has been hitting on Hillary"

1. "It's so hot, Barry Bonds is injecting Slurpees in his ass"